The popularity of commercial spokes-people isn’t a new. While today we have the Geico’s Hump Day Camel and Progressive’s Flo, they were predated by many. One being The Incredible Crash Dummies. Of the many agendas being shoved down kid’s throats by the Bush administration, wearing your seat belt was a prevalent one. Commercials showing dummies Vince & Larry crashing into a wall and spouting some message about safety were frequent on Saturday mornings. The concept became so popular that they not only spawned their own toy line, but a cartoon as well.

In May of 1993 the “Incredible Crash Dummies” special aired. Again, it was billed as a special, but this was obviously a pilot for a series Fox wasn’t going to pick up, and with good reason. The show used computer generated animation, which looked bad at the time, let alone now. The show starred dummies Slick and Spin. They needed to recover the Torso-9000 from the evil dummy Junkman.

crashdummies2I’m not sure whether I should be more offended or creeped out by this. The animation, voice acting, and story were all sub par. The theme song seemed to be sung by real people while actual music played, so there’s a plus. There is  one aspect I can’t get past: their eyelids, or lack thereof. Animation has always taken liberty with the human form, but this was just odd. The dummies lacked eyelids, but their pupils still blinked. Skincrawling.

crashdummies3Aside from a few toys — which were actually fun (they broke apart) — there was also a video game. Before game production became expensive, consoles were littered with licensed games. Released on the Sega Master System, SNES, NES and Sega Game Gear, the game had you play as … honestly I don’t think you care. It’s as bad as you think it is.

At this point you might be asking yourself why I bothered writing about such a small footnote in cartoon history. Because shut up, that’s why.

I’m sure everyone over 30 remembers the PSAs. Does anyone remember the toys, cartoon or game? Comment below!

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Tony writes for his own site, thecredhulk.com, about comics, video games, movies, TV and more, six days a week. You can follow his updates on Facebook or Twitter. Drop by and tell ’em hi.

I ended a sentence with a preposition and I don’t care.