barnyard_commandosOccasionally, rather than developing a new, creative property to sell toys, or shoehorning a toy into a show, no matter how little sense it made, toy makers would shoot for an even lower bar. They would take generic concepts and pathetically attempt to add character. A few only had a toy line, but one managed to fart out a cartoon. I give to you, Barnyard Commandos.

food_fightersThere’s no good reason to go into a lot of detail about this one, so I won’t. Basically, the show had the R.A.M.S squaring off with the P.O.R.K.S. I’m sure both were creative acronyms. The members had military titles crossed with pun sheep or pig names like Pilot Fluff Pendleton or Private Side O’Bacon. The show lasted 13 episodes. I remember watching a few. I think the teams were eating at opposite picnic tables or something, I don’t know.

army_antsBarnyard was a pathetic cash grab from Playmates. Think this was the only one? Oh no, there were more. Thankfully, they stayed firmly in the plastic realm. Mattel had Food Fighters and Hasbro had Army Ants.

I want to play a game (he says in his best Jigsaw voice). I’ll throw out a bunch of names, you guess which of the three lines they’re from. General Patant. Major Legger Mutton. Burgerdier General. General Hamfat Lardo. General Mc-Anther. Private Pizza. Pig Out. Chip the Ripper. Bug-eye. Lieutenant Lummy Lumpkins. Get them all correct? Ha! I made the last one up!

So, um, yeah. Barnyard Commandos. Remember it? Comment below.

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In addition to THN’s Saturday Morning Cartoons and Nerd at the Movies, Tony writes for his own site, thecredhulk.com, about comics, video games, movies, TV and more, six days a week. You can follow his updates
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300 words, natch.